Growing Up

Today my cute little viejita turned 80.  AMAZING.  But with every high there is a low and unfortunately my grandmother’s milestone birthday was no exception. 

Unfortunately last Friday Sept. 2 my great aunt (my grandmother’s sister) passed away.  She was very frail and her health had been going down year after year.  To the point where she was what some would call a vegetable.  None the less, it was a harsh reality for my grandmother.  She comes from a family of 7 children, 3 of which came to the US. . and 4 of which stayed behind in Cuba.  Currently she is the only one left of the sibling in the states and there are 2 in Cuba.  As most immigrant stories, our family’s is a sad one when you really stop to think about the ordeal.  But I will actually brush upon that in another post in the future.

It was while at my Tia Hilda’s funeral that I was hit the vivid realization that I am no longer "una Niña".  Yes: I am married, Yes: I have  two children, Yes: I AM 29 years old... but it was when I found myself having my once so vibrant grandmother crying on MY shoulder as I held her that I truly felt what it meant to be an adult.  A child would never be expected to give this comfort or support that I found myself being more than willing to offer.  It was at this point in my life where I came to the reality that I am now my parents.  I am expected to carry the torch that is our family’s traditions and teach my children as my parents had taught us.  It really beings tears to my eyes, for so many different reasons.  Since now my brother and I are the only ones left with grandparents from my mom’s side of the family it hits me--- my parents are my grandparents and so on and so on.

The older I get, the more my loved one’s immortality becomes a slap in the face.  I have so much faith, I really do...perhaps it is that which soothes my soul.  But I am human, and selfish- and I am glad that I still have both of my mom’s parents.  Those two little viejitos are my loves.  My grandfather will turn 80 January 13 and I am planning on having a party to celebrate both of their birthdays.  I am actually pretty stoked about the whole party planning process- again another post another day.

Ugh my ADD is out of control the bouncing around topics is annoying me, I can only imagine how it must be to follow when reading.  I apologize---

I am feeling older, but it is a heart felt kind of older.  The one which is realizing that the end of certain eras are coming, and how the usual bills and responsibilities are not the only things that come with age.  One of the most important responsibilities is to ensure my culture is passed down to my children.  Currently I feel I have turned into my parents, but I am definitely looking forward to becoming my grandparents.